Sure, Mandela was great and all that, but did you see The Sound of Music…?
Our country is as alive as the hills so favored by the Austrian nuns of World War II. A certain televised musical, starring Carrie Underwood, set the nation afire last week–indeed, the theater friends on my Facebook feed (admittedly, many) treated the event either orgiastically, or with the kind of derision usually reserved for homophobes, bullies, and Monsanto.
In order to capitalize on the hype, NBC has already planned a number of musical extravaganzas, both star-studded and in line with today’s annoying tastes. All it took was a call to good friend and neighbor, Mariska Hargitay, and the story was all mine!
Eight Musicals Being Produced By NBC in Light of the Success of The Sound of Music
1) The Sound of Music 2–If you thought fleeing from the Nazis was an adventure, wait till you watch this moving sequel, featuring the famous Von Trapp U.S. Tour of ’46.
Climb ev’ry mountain/Ford ev’ry stream/Follow ev’ry raindbow/Till..you..find…directions to the Town Hall in Akron–Rupert, stop the bus. You missed the turn, dummkopf!
2) Rent adapted to the present NYC economy. Now, middle class people are wondering how they’re going to pay last year’s rent, while the starving artists are dead…or have gone back to Jersey.
“Mom says I have to move out.”
3) Following the Underwood blueprint, expect to see Wicked, featuring many of American Idol’s greatest stars.
4) My Fair Lady Gaga
5) The most beloved of the actors from NBC’s past shows, have been recruited to star in A Chorus Line.
6) The success of the nuns in The Sound of Music has proven to NBC that the timing is right for nuns to finally make the theatrical comeback that we’ve all been awaiting. As a result, Nunsense and Sister Act the Musical, both directed by Trevor Nunn, are in production.
Sets? Nun. Costumes? Nun. Connection between Catholicism and intentional humor? Well, you get it…
7) Law and Order: The Musical. The mock-up (below) is in CD format, since the people who casually listen to songs from musicals, often still buy CDs.
8) Underwood will be returning to star in another of Broadway’s most adored musicals.